How My Friend Talking About Romance Makes Me Feel
So I stumbled onto the little mishap that is tumblr and I look back at the connections I made with people via messages. And then I stumble onto an old friends page. His name is Gonçalo and I miss how we used to talk. He was a person I happened to meet online from Portugal and we’d talk now and then in both our native tongues and sometimes mixed. I then saw his work that had been posted on his page connected via Wordpress to which all the posts are written in Portuguese. And I think they’re beautiful.
A lot of me thinks that I can’t write about the feeling of love for someone else in the way he does. It’s raw, and it’s pure; such is a dream on paper.
It’s the kind of warm that your stomach feels that is better than the sensation of hot chocolate; and sweeter. The way it dances around in the readers mind, more graceful than the little flutter of butterflies who’s wings reflect and exude the sunlight off of each splash of colour of their markings, in the sunset of summer in the meadows.
They seem to demonstrate some sort of immunity to negativity which will never cease to render me breathless.
I think the true warmth is when you take those words that have been proclaimed and relate it to your own romantic endeavour. I want to be able to laugh like on the first date at little coffee shops when I’m past the ripe age of 60, I want to feel like the floor underneath me doesn’t exist.
But then I think about it again, and realise: ‘I’m not that far off in what I have now’
And I think I’ll be truly happy with him. If things are as right as I feel they are, then maybe I do get to finally be happy in life.
And although it isn’t up to someone else to make me happy when I can’t do it myself, their smile helps at least. Their embraces make me feel less alone, so why can’t I indulge in it, and have that as the beginning of my day, rather than not leaving my bed to start it at all?
I don’t need someone else to make me happy. But encouragement to be happy? ‘Tis a thing that people shouldn’t be getting enough of.
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